I’ve just finished The Last Letter From Your Lover by Jojo Moyes and for once I’m blogging about it on time! Not because I’m worried that I’ll forget what I want to say, but because I’m afraid that if I don’t get it out right now I’ll burst into a million tiny pieces. And no one ever recovers from that! I honestly don’t even know where to start. This book could not have come at a better time. It is so incredibly relevant to my life at this moment. its almost scary. For three reasons.
Even though both of us cheated during our relationship, we never really had any affairs. Nothing emotional. He was several women over the course of a year and I was a younger man for the course of a few weeks. Purely physical, mostly out of spite. Since then, since the divorce we’ve kind of had an affair together. If ex-spouses can have affairs. In ways this book ties into those feelings a lot. Not only from Jennifer’s point of view (being the married woman) but also from Ellie’s (as the other woman) (both in different times. One in 1960, the other in 2003). I’ve been in both shoes. I know the feelings behind them very well. So I definitely felt connected on that level. Very intensely. Plus I know all about lost love. And the deep ache it leaves inside you, while leaving you altogether numb at the same time. As if somehow love and loss combined just equals one mass contradiction.
It also plays into this area because of past events within my family, even recent events. It kind of serves as a reminder that there is more than one story, sometimes you only have half the details. You need to look at the bigger picture. More often than not there are more than just two people who are affected by your actions. Be it your children, your respective lovers, your immediate family. There is more to think about than just the two involved in the act. And even those two have their reasons. Nothing is ever as simple as it seems.
The second way it falls into my life at the right time is the fact I was just talking about how lovers talk about their significant others. How love is purely selfish these days. No one loves anyone for who they are anymore, but for what that person can do for them. Somewhere through the years people seem to have misplaced the meaning of the word. With the way current generations are just slinging it about, I highly doubt we’ll ever find the real meaning ever again. Ex: I have many a friend who would like a love comparable to the movies and songs of our times. HINT: Those aren’t real… Love is not an escape from reality. In fact love shows you a new reality. I posted my thoughts on how lost love is these days, and I hinted at it, but I never out-rightly said that romance is also lost. Intimacy. More than just pure physicality. On an emotional level. People are failing to connect. Every day. We think we are. Holding hands, kissing, sex. Telling them we love them. But plainly leaving it at that. Barely scratching the surface of the emotions we feel.
The third reason, which is going to seem really silly to most readers, especially since I don’t talk about all my fangirl stuff here… but she mentions the TARDIS. She uses it as a comparison for the library. I nearly lost my shit. For those of you who don’t know, the TARDIS is from BBC’s Doctor Who. Of which I am a huge lover. So this reference was a pretty massive thing as far as I’m concerned 😀
With that being said, I’d like to post a few direct quotes from the book and then talk a bit about why these particular quotes have such an effect on me.
“Now, of course, the Clives of this world won’t be writing letters. They’d text her. “All right, babe?” She wonders whether she would have ended the relationship by mobile phone.” – This right here just serves a purpose to show how lost we’ve become in technology as far as romance and intimacy go.
“… You just need to talk honestly. Painfully honestly. And you may not always get the answers you want. that was the thing I was reminded of when I reread Anthony’s letters after you left last week. There were no games. I never met anyone – before or afterward- that I could be quite so honest with.” – I really just like this one, because it highlights the importance of honesty and communication. Two things most relationships now days lack. Including my own. I’m terrible at communicating.
“She would never be his. They had come so close, and she would never be his. How was he supposed to live with that knowledge?”- A feeling I, personally, know all to well.
“It was fine when it was just letters…. I could be myself. I could be this person he remembered. I was so calm and reassuring. And now… The one consolation I have had in all of this was knowing there was a man out there who loved me, who saw the best in me. Even through the awfulness of our last meeting I’ve known that in me he saw something he wanted more than anything else in the world. What if he looks at me and is disappointed? It’ll be worse than if we’d never met again. Worse.” – Illustrates the point again of how easy it is to correspond via writing. How easily the emotions pour out of us when we aren’t standing face to face with the one thing that scares us the most…love. Not only that I just love this paragraph. I think we all wish to be longed for this way. “… In me he saw something he wanted more than anything else in the world…” Just beautiful.